Of course by this time we were all laughing at our childhood foibles and the whole crowd seemed to want in on the conversation. One by one each sounded off with their opinion on the question at hand.
"Nuns," said one "wear a kind of bloomer."
"How do you know that," I asked.
"I don't," was the response, "Just guessing."
Nance, the hippy chick chimed in, "No underwear. Nuns always go commando."
"How do you know," I asked.
"That's what I heard," was the response.
"Heard? Who told you that?" I inquired.
"Buddy-I just heard him tell you."
Bar talk. And so it went, one patron after another, with nothing better to do added their two-cents worth. Of course the inevitable comparison was made with Scotsmen and their kilts and in jumped Kermit. Kermit is the bar know-it-all. Kermit has a photographic memory and whenever a question arises he's the one we ask. He insisted that Scotsmen don't wear underpants under their kilts. Conway jumped in insisting, "It would be beneath them."
Ignoring Conway's pun, Kermit explained: "In June of 2011, Angus McClure married Sarah Grant in Scotland. He wore the traditional kilt and she wore the traditional white dress. At the reception afterward he perched his poorly-wiped backside on her pristine frock, leaving an unsightly smear. Scotsmen do not wear underpants, although kilt-wearing Irish bagpipers do."
Everybody in the bar winced.
Someone in the dark recesses of the back bar yelled out "Ask Efren" referring to Sonoma County supervisor Efren Carrillo who was caught trying to break into a ladies house clad only in his underpants and socks at 3 AM in the morning. That brought down the house. Conway interjected "forget it, he'd just try and cover it up." Laughter again.
"Enough of this foolishness" I thought and grabbed my iPad and
DO NUNS WEAR UNDERPANTS
Continued from Page 1
(Courtesy of: Russian River Times)
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googled "Do nuns wear underpants?" To my surprise there were hundreds of sites dealing with the very question. Sadly, though, these sites contradicted one another. For example, one claimed nuns wear two underskirts-one made of black serge and the other made of cotton. As to the underwear this site stipulates what they wear underneath their habits is "simply a matter of personal preference." Another site also concurred about the two black underskirts, but went on to read, "underneath those underskirts there is nothing else." Yet another claims they wear "Khaki bloomers under [their] habit."
I know a local lady who used to be a nun. She has a good sense of humor. I thought about asking her but thought better of broaching the subject as poor taste. After all who is going to ask a nun if she wears underpants? I finally turned to Buddy and, to paraphrase Winston Churchill, told him that whether or not nuns wear underpants is a "riddle, wrapped in a mystery inside a habit."
Conway interjected, "I hope this doesn't become a habit."
Everyone booed.
Sources:
QA Collections, What Do Nuns wear under their habits? http://www.qacollections.com/What-do-nuns-wear-under-their-habits (Accessed September 13, 2013)
Do nuns wear a special kind of church standard issue underwear? http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/2162766#13791145811803&{"type":"request","selfName":"attract","fName":"attract.remoteFrameLoaded","args":[null],"callbackFunction":"undefined"} (Accessed September 14, 2013)
Scottish Wedding Fight Breaks Out Over Kilt-Related Wardrobe Malfunction (Picture) http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/06/02/scottish-wedding-fight_n_870389.html (Accessed September 16, 2013)
Wrights Nuns Wear Catalogue, http://www.wrightscatalog.com/ (Accessed November 1, 2013)
E-MAIL ME ddemers901@sonic.net